Chador · Islam · mental health · Religion · The Middle East · Uncategorized · Women and Islam

And this is why it will always be a “man’s world”: Congrats to men, you got this, because some of us women are too busy fighting over what to wear, you’ve outsmarted us again – clever men you.

And this is why it will always be a “man’s world” : Congrats to men, you got this, because some of us women are too busy fighting over what to wear, you’ve outsmarted us again – clever men you

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Women comment on my chador, they say, “Oh how unbearable”, “A man should wear it too!”, “Repulsive!”, “Male dominance!”, “Oppressive!”- I have heard it all. So today, I am pms’ing (Thanks to the understanding trolls for all the motivation). I am skirmishing back and forth with some of these snobbish condescending female trolls; who if I had to judge fairly, as they have so kindly done to me, I would say that they spend too much time investing in looks than they do in real and actual life. So, the following words are for them:

The things unbearable for some women, like me, is the pain of plastic surgery, the harsh fumes of chemicals for treatment of hair (that dries it out and changes it’s natural texture), dyes, perms, straighteners, extensions or fake nails that prevent them from enjoying some of the finer things in life. Heavy makeup that speeds up the aging process and ruins your skin over time, tanning in the damaging sun, fake tanners, bleaching, waxing, lipo-suction, tummy tucks, lip fillers, bot-ox, butt to face surgery (yes it happens), stretch mark removal crap, laser surgery for “imperfections”, diet pills and lets not forget; busting ass all day to look “good”, breast, thigh, arm and rear augmentation; all these things women do for men are just unbearable to me. I’ve never gotten my nails did, ever. At one point (I can count on one hand throughout my life, and I am near 40) I used to get my hair done and that was enough to kill me, so I stopped years ago. Never had heavy make-up done for any event, cosmetic surgery and all of the above, because even all this is painful to me. I prefer to do my own make-up on rare occasions, if I even put it one once a month. It is real sacrifice and takes so much time and I hate the way heavy make-up feels. It is just nasty in hot weather too. (Aye no! With chemicals dripping from your hair and eye makeup smudge, letting those toxins seep into your pores etc.) So, I could never imagine the side effects that women have had to endure to keep up with these social beauty pageants just for men.Some women are at self beautification techniques all day, or the spa everyday. (never been to a spa either!)

Honestly, I have known some who have died as a result of trying to perfect their exterior; they’ve sacrificed their lives to go under the knife, to look good for what they believe man wanted. I could not do it. I guess I am not strong enough as some women are to tolerate these creations by man; in their male dominated societies; that demand such high maintenance women. If a man has that woman by his side making these ultimate sacrifices for him, he is a lucky fellow? The demands of western society were obviously too much for me to handle: I commend all the women who force themselves or who are forced to keep up, just for hanging in there. And although I see many women who fit this description, of a glammed up rockin’ barbie doll, that will quickly fade till the newest edition comes along, I do not hound or harass them about their way of life. I’ve never  bullied them about their appearance, that I find unbearable. I feel sorry for them and this is why I have been quiet for so long. Furthermore, I think the prices they must invest in products for “looking good” are perhaps more unbearable. All that doe is wasted just so she can maintain her queenly appearance?  But, I won’t tell them to feed a village of poor people, build a school, take care of someone who needs it or get them medical support with their money instead of getting a that nose job or colonic flush (as my beliefs are firm in giving to those less off). Nope that is not me, none of my business to tell them anything. Ladies just cover your ears and block me out, would not want you to consider doing anything generous, other than pleasing your man, with the money you put away for a face job. (Anyways, how do you afford all that junk you keep in your trunk?) Mistakenly, I have often wondered and thought, I am nothing like you! But you know what? I am wrong. I am like many of you. I find we have much more in common than I care to admit, because sometimes I look at you and think; “How unbearable!” and “Oppressive”, “What a slave to man”, “My is she letting the male dominated society get to her”, “This oppression has caused her to totally lose it”. I guess we do view one another in the same regards. And maybe this is why you burden me and take your anger out on me, because you feel that too?

So ladies you have asked for it, after years of being kind and cool through all your snobby, condescending and unkind remarks, about my wardrobe, my faith, my looks, you got what you wanted, my “opinion” on you-with a bit of the smarty pants attitude I am known for. But there is one major difference that lingers…if they must know I am not wearing my chador or clothes for a man as many of them do, I wear it for Allah; and that for me makes having to wear some extra material over my body so much more bearable.

 

  • Although many of my remarks were ‘just deserts’ for my hater club and a big disorganized, sarcastic rant: I do think women burden themselves and their bodies more than they need to, to keep up with the male ego. They are thrown into this way of life to keep up with a never changing mentality of a man’s world, but ever evolving synthetic ambitions and technology designed by man for his desires – above a woman’s needs. All in all, there comes a time where some women need to grow up, even myself – I can admit- in order to advance in our respective societies . We must have the courage to be women and support one another without thinking to judge one another on appearance, what another woman wears or how they look. Women get enough of that pressure from men. So that is what I used to think, till today, I do not feel it from many women sadly. So why don’t I just give up?

 

 

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